January 17, 2020

An Ode to Bottle Killing Mode

Life is full of passing seasons; sometimes it’s hot, sometimes it’s cold, sometimes you’re flush and sometimes you’re clipping coupons. And before I get too esoteric, I’ll bring it back to our beloved spirit: sometimes you’re opening bottles and sometimes there’s clean up to do.


Yes, I’m talking about bottle killing mode. When you’ve got great and exciting stuff waiting in the wings, but you just can’t bring yourself to open it right now. Bottle killing mode is when you’ve got to finish off your open whiskies because you are tired of looking at those same old suspects. Sometimes it can be great fun: you get to focus on things that you bought for a reason. Sometimes it can be terrible: you didn’t finish that bottle for a reason and you just can’t find a friend to take it away. Great or average, fantastic or poor; you’ve got open whiskey that ain’t going anywhere.

It sort of creeps up on you. For weeks you’re trying new stuff and opening fantastic whiskey and then all of a sudden: the cabinet overfloweth. And so, when it comes time to cull the herd, you’ll find that those two ounce pours become five ounce pours in a pursuit to clean out the old. Normally, the bourbon comes to the equator of that big ice block, but when you’re in bottle killing mode, that old boy is swimming. The heavy hand of bottle killing mode can be a glorious and downright crazy thing.

Perhaps "bottle killing mode" is a bit of a harsh term. Kind of sounds like I'm going to take these empties out and blast em with a pistol...Maybe I should call it "cabinet turnover."

Whatever we should call it, let's give a cheers to out with the old and in with the new. Cheers to you Bottle Killing Mode! Remember; you bought those whiskies for a reason and just try to remember that initial excitement while you finish it. Maybe you got burned by high price, maybe it just underwhelmed you.